Top tips on how to divorce – amicably from a divorce lawyer


Marriage breakdown and divorce can be exhausting. It’s a very emotional time in a person’s life and can often lead to stress and anxiety as well as grief. At Pinney Talfourd, our team of divorce solicitors understand how stressful divorce can be. Not just for those going through the divorce, but for their families and loved ones too.

Our divorce lawyers have assisted many men and women going through a relationship breakdown or divorce. Our family law team are ranked Tier 1 in Legal 500 and strive to ensure that our clients divorce proceedings are as pain-free as possible.

Below are some Pinney Talfourd divorce solicitor tips to consider when divorcing.

Have you considered relationship counselling?

Is this an option? Have you tried marriage counselling? Would this help to save your marriage? Do you still want to save your marriage?

Marriage / relationship counselling may allow you to see if there is any way that you can save your marriage. And if not, at least you have tried which we find often provides clients with emotional closure. Counselling will also allow you to hear each other’s side as to why the relationship has broken down and can be a way of accepting that a relationship is over and to be able to move forward – amicably.

Be prepared.

Before you enter into a separation agreement or apply for a divorce or dissolution of a civil partnership, you need to make sure that you are prepared for the bumpy ride ahead. At this stage, are you 100% sure that this is what you want? Are you prepared to start the process?


Have you discussed things with your partner? Have you talked about your feelings, concerns, goals, and a way forward – together? Communicating with each other can really make a difference when it comes to an amicable divorce. Try to remain calm and avoid unnecessary confrontation.

Take legal advice – early.

Please don’t leave it too late to seek some expert legal advice through a divorce solicitor. Especially when there are properties, assets, children, and other financial matters to consider. Speaking to a divorce lawyer  or divorce solicitor will allow you to understand what claims you and your partner may have against each other and the road ahead to separating.

conflict. Emotions may run high and if they do, arrange an alternative time to try talking to each other again. Please ensure your solicitor is a family specialist and a member of Resolution.

Protect your children.

It’s important that you both protect your children from arguments and slanderous comments about each other. Your children will love you both equally and feel a huge sense of grief in the fact that their parents are divorcing. Reassure your children that as parents you both love that and that this decision is not their fault. Guide them through the process and be there to answer any questions that they may have – ideally together.


If it is hard for you both to communicate – consider mediation especially for issues relating to your children. Get help and guidance from someone outside the relationship. Trained mediators can help you both understand from each other’s perspective and guide any negotiations that may need to take place between both parties.

Surround yourself by loved ones.

Divorce is often described as a bereavement. It’s extremely important that you surround yourself by family and friends whom you can talk to so that you do not deal with this alone. Divorce is emotional and can be extremely draining. You may feel like a failure, hurt by your partner, lost, out of control and sad. Surrounding yourself by people who can help you process your emotions and reassure you will benefit you hugely.

Understand your finances.

It important that both parties fully understand their financial situation. Do you have any debts? What assets do you have? What are your incomes? What pensions do you have? Are there issues relating to tax to be resolved? Will you be entitled to any benefits when separated? What will your outgoings be when you no longer live together? Can you borrow on your own to mortgage? What financial costs are associated with any children? Are you about to inherit any monies? Can you remain in your current property? What would a Judge do if they were to hear your case?

If you are considering divorce proceedings and would like to discuss further, we offer a free 1 hour consultation. For those seeking a divorce lawyer, consultations can be made at one of our offices in Brentwood, Chelmsford, Hornchurch or Upminster.

Our divorce solicitors can also provide consultations via teams and phone calls if you are unable to travel to one of our locations. To make an appointment, please call 01708 229 444 or email

This article was written for advice only.


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