Planning for the summer holidays after separation

School holidays can be difficult for parents to manage, especially in the immediate aftermath of a separation. With the summer holidays fast approaching, we have set out some practical guidance on how to plan to manage the holidays with as little stress as possible.

Create a parenting plan

Ideally, parents will work together to agree how to share the school holidays between them in the best interests of their child, without the assistance from the court or solicitors. They might prepare a parenting plan, setting out the time the child is to spend with each parent, including school holidays. This can clarify expectations and reduce misunderstandings and conflict. Many parents will agree on the principle that school holidays will be shared equally and then make a plan for the exact split of the holidays each year, for example, alternating half terms and weeks in the summer, Christmas and Easter holidays. However, every family is different and the holidays can be split in any way that you both agree. You can use the free parenting plan template from the Children and Family Court Advisory and Support Service (CAFCASS).

Concentrate on the big picture

When trying to agree arrangements, it is important to remember that your child looks forward to spending quality time with you and your ex, as well as your extended families over the holidays and that it is in your child’s best interest for you and your ex-partner to get on as well as possible. That might mean working to improve your communication, and both of you compromising. However, we recognise that this is not possible in every co-parenting relationship.

What if we can’t reach an agreement ourselves?

Unfortunately, reaching an agreement is not always easy, especially where relationships are strained. In this case, mediation might be a sensible next step, if your child’s other parent agrees to attend. A mediator is a neutral third party, who might assist you to communicate with your ex-partner more effectively to resolve a dispute. You can take advantage of the family mediation voucher scheme, to help with the costs of mediation.  

As a last resort, parents can apply to the court for a Child Arrangements Order to govern the time that their child spends with each parent throughout the year, including a set plan for school holidays, or for permission to take their child on a specific holiday. A solicitor can also try and assist you in negotiating with your ex-partner, or help you make an application to court. 

Taking your child abroad  

If you have a Child Arrangements Order in place which says that your child “lives with” you (even every other weekend, for example), you are entitled to take your child out of this jurisdiction (England and Wales) for up to 28 days without the other parent’s permission. The holiday does still have to take place during the time that your child is supposed to be living with you.

However, if there is no order in place, you always need the express permission of everyone with parental responsibility (usually the other parent) to take your child abroad (anywhere other than England or Wales), each and every time you travel. No additional permissions are needed for holidays within England and Wales.

The other parent is usually more likely to agree to a holiday if you provide them with details of the travel arrangements, such as the name of the hotel you plan to stay at, the dates and times of flights you are planning to book, and any extra details such as activities you plan on doing. This might make the other parent feel more comfortable with the holiday, especially where the separation is new and they are not used to their child travelling without them.

Where communications between parents are difficult, the law about taking children abroad often causes parents to apply for a court order in respect of child arrangements, to alleviate the need to obtain permission for every holiday. As the court process can involve significant delays, it is sensible to start planning well in advance of any holiday you want to take, if it seems as if the court’s involvement will be required.

When travelling with your child, it is sensible to bring a copy of the Child Arrangements Order with you, if you have one, or a letter from the other parent confirming that you have permission to remove the child from England and Wales, as well as the child’s birth certificate. This can prevent you running into difficulty at the border.

How Pinney Talfourd can help

If you need support in reaching an agreement or applying to court regarding contact over the summer holidays, our family law specialists are here to assist you. Please contact our Family team on 0800 011 1195 to set up your free 45 minute consultation.